What motivated u to improve yourself irl

I didn't like who I was becoming and I felt stuck and unfulfilled while i saw other people around me living with purpose and growing while I was just existing. I improved by reflecting, cutting bad habits, surrounding myself with better influences and holding myself accountable.
 
I never really learned how to stand up for myself growing up. About three years ago, I started training in MMA. I’m still not the best with words, but these days I carry myself with a lot more confidence.
 
Seeing my life fall to pieces slowly, consuming more drugs every day and seeing how much pain I was causing to my family. I quit 4 studies in the first year causing 17k debt. I stopped paying my bills to get drugs, causing more debt. I lost all my friends and started losing connection to my family too.
I remember my turning point very vividly, I had just consumed more drugs so I put on some music. I had it on shuffle, a very sad song from my childhood that my mom always listened in the car came on and it absolutely broke me. I called my mom that same day and we together started looking for professional help.
I will go more in-depth on my 2 year sober giveaway post, I don't want to tell the entire story here yet! Just know, it gets better if you get off your ass and do something.

It took a lot of work to get where I am now and I wouldn't exchange everything that happened for anything else, my mistakes and downfalls have made me who I am today.
 
This is going to be rather long so buckle up. Also: trigger warning.

I had just finished school and got my EMT certification back in 2019. For a couple of months everything was fine and dandy, typical EMS shit going on (ifykyk). Around comes the beginning of February, the first reports of Covid appear when, like almost everyone else, I didn’t give a shit about it.

Cue: inter hospital transfer from the local hospital to the university hospital in a neighboring city. Started out like any other transfer, 27 year old female, 28 weeks pregnant with sudden onset of debilitating headaches. From then on it went to shits.

Already with a bad feeling we started the drive to the other hospital, my colleague in the back chatting with the patient, me driving and vibing to the radio. The patients husband right behind the ambulance in his car. After about 10 minutes of driving I can hear less and less chatting in the back so I ask if everything is alright. Nope. Our patient was slowly but surely drifting out of consciousness. So we decide to step it up a bit and go lights and sirens. I can see in the mirror that the patients husband doesn’t give a fuck about the red lights I’m driving through and stays right behind us.

We arrive at the university hospital, and it being my first time there I ask the gatekeeper where we need to go (it’s a big place with multiple buildings, essentially a city within a city and 2 emergency rooms). Out of nowhere, the back doors of the ambulance fly open, panic on my colleagues eyes. Our patient had just stopped breathing.

The gatekeeper was a sound dude, called the hospitals own emergency team and together with them we hauled ass to the respective ER. Our patient still wasn’t breathing and completely unconscious, but like I said, she was pregnant so there were 2 life’s on the line.

A couple of days later, during my next shit, I called the hospital to check up on the patient. I was still only 18, this was my first actually critically ill patient I had responsibility for (every other one was during training). With hindsight, this call was a mistake. Our patient had suffered a catastrophic brain bleed and both she and her unborn child died.

This rattled me to the bone. Seeing how quick and easy not one, but two lifes could end without a chance to do anything but watch. This was the point where I actually became an adult I think because it changed my perspective massively.

Whenever I talked to the older colleagues in the fire department, they said during your time in this job you learn how prescious every day of life is because it can end so suddenly. I always felt like they were just making it up in an effort to help me not become as numb to the everyday shit you go through in this career. That day that changed. I realized that they weren’t talking shit and every single one of them had an experience like that. And it probably shook and changed them as much as it did for me.

I drastically changed my behavior after that, going so far that I avoided driving that main road that led to the university hospital, first only when I was transporting a patient, later on also when I went that way in my private life. The first time I passed the bridge where that woman had drifted out of consciousness, everything came back once again and I suffered my first panic attack.

Almost 5.5 years later I still vividly remember every single detail about this call. I have since learned to live with that experience. I talked with many colleagues whom I am still massively thankful for supporting me through that time. The only regret I have is not seeing a therapist but that’s another story. While this doesn’t plague me anymore, the lesson I learned still stays with me and I hope it never leaves me, even if it is corny as fuck:

Live each day of your life like it could be your last, because it very well could be.
 
Seeing my life fall to pieces slowly, consuming more drugs every day and seeing how much pain I was causing to my family. I quit 4 studies in the first year causing 17k debt. I stopped paying my bills to get drugs, causing more debt. I lost all my friends and started losing connection to my family too.
I remember my turning point very vividly, I had just consumed more drugs so I put on some music. I had it on shuffle, a very sad song from my childhood that my mom always listened in the car came on and it absolutely broke me. I called my mom that same day and we together started looking for professional help.
I will go more in-depth on my 2 year sober giveaway post, I don't want to tell the entire story here yet! Just know, it gets better if you get off your ass and do something.

It took a lot of work to get where I am now and I wouldn't exchange everything that happened for anything else, my mistakes and downfalls have made me who I am today.
Damn man thats terryfying. No jokes right now i acctually hope you will succeed in this life. I wish u all the best
 
Seeing my life fall to pieces slowly, consuming more drugs every day and seeing how much pain I was causing to my family. I quit 4 studies in the first year causing 17k debt. I stopped paying my bills to get drugs, causing more debt. I lost all my friends and started losing connection to my family too.
I remember my turning point very vividly, I had just consumed more drugs so I put on some music. I had it on shuffle, a very sad song from my childhood that my mom always listened in the car came on and it absolutely broke me. I called my mom that same day and we together started looking for professional help.
I will go more in-depth on my 2 year sober giveaway post, I don't want to tell the entire story here yet! Just know, it gets better if you get off your ass and do something.

It took a lot of work to get where I am now and I wouldn't exchange everything that happened for anything else, my mistakes and downfalls have made me who I am today.
Being able to improve and somehow succeed despite all the debt and usage is the best feat I've seen in a while. Nice job gang
 
Once I learned that making meth was a dangerous way of life with little upside, and saw the ways of Cocaine production I think I really started to turn my life around. Now I have multiple cars worth millions of dollars, over 50 assault rifles and 0 friends to show it all too.
 
Seeing my life fall to pieces slowly, consuming more drugs every day and seeing how much pain I was causing to my family. I quit 4 studies in the first year causing 17k debt. I stopped paying my bills to get drugs, causing more debt. I lost all my friends and started losing connection to my family too.
I remember my turning point very vividly, I had just consumed more drugs so I put on some music. I had it on shuffle, a very sad song from my childhood that my mom always listened in the car came on and it absolutely broke me. I called my mom that same day and we together started looking for professional help.
I will go more in-depth on my 2 year sober giveaway post, I don't want to tell the entire story here yet! Just know, it gets better if you get off your ass and do something.

It took a lot of work to get where I am now and I wouldn't exchange everything that happened for anything else, my mistakes and downfalls have made me who I am today.
Proud of u ether way my guy! U deserve all the best
This is going to be rather long so buckle up. Also: trigger warning.

I had just finished school and got my EMT certification back in 2019. For a couple of months everything was fine and dandy, typical EMS shit going on (ifykyk). Around comes the beginning of February, the first reports of Covid appear when, like almost everyone else, I didn’t give a shit about it.

Cue: inter hospital transfer from the local hospital to the university hospital in a neighboring city. Started out like any other transfer, 27 year old female, 28 weeks pregnant with sudden onset of debilitating headaches. From then on it went to shits.

Already with a bad feeling we started the drive to the other hospital, my colleague in the back chatting with the patient, me driving and vibing to the radio. The patients husband right behind the ambulance in his car. After about 10 minutes of driving I can hear less and less chatting in the back so I ask if everything is alright. Nope. Our patient was slowly but surely drifting out of consciousness. So we decide to step it up a bit and go lights and sirens. I can see in the mirror that the patients husband doesn’t give a fuck about the red lights I’m driving through and stays right behind us.

We arrive at the university hospital, and it being my first time there I ask the gatekeeper where we need to go (it’s a big place with multiple buildings, essentially a city within a city and 2 emergency rooms). Out of nowhere, the back doors of the ambulance fly open, panic on my colleagues eyes. Our patient had just stopped breathing.

The gatekeeper was a sound dude, called the hospitals own emergency team and together with them we hauled ass to the respective ER. Our patient still wasn’t breathing and completely unconscious, but like I said, she was pregnant so there were 2 life’s on the line.

A couple of days later, during my next shit, I called the hospital to check up on the patient. I was still only 18, this was my first actually critically ill patient I had responsibility for (every other one was during training). With hindsight, this call was a mistake. Our patient had suffered a catastrophic brain bleed and both she and her unborn child died.

This rattled me to the bone. Seeing how quick and easy not one, but two lifes could end without a chance to do anything but watch. This was the point where I actually became an adult I think because it changed my perspective massively.

Whenever I talked to the older colleagues in the fire department, they said during your time in this job you learn how prescious every day of life is because it can end so suddenly. I always felt like they were just making it up in an effort to help me not become as numb to the everyday shit you go through in this career. That day that changed. I realized that they weren’t talking shit and every single one of them had an experience like that. And it probably shook and changed them as much as it did for me.

I drastically changed my behavior after that, going so far that I avoided driving that main road that led to the university hospital, first only when I was transporting a patient, later on also when I went that way in my private life. The first time I passed the bridge where that woman had drifted out of consciousness, everything came back once again and I suffered my first panic attack.

Almost 5.5 years later I still vividly remember every single detail about this call. I have since learned to live with that experience. I talked with many colleagues whom I am still massively thankful for supporting me through that time. The only regret I have is not seeing a therapist but that’s another story. While this doesn’t plague me anymore, the lesson I learned still stays with me and I hope it never leaves me, even if it is corny as fuck:

Live each day of your life like it could be your last, because it very well could be.
Same too u bro, u already told me the story but ur doing better, be proud of urself for that
 
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