Round 2, epic rap I made.

[dante333]

So, I recently made a another song/rap/thingy and I wanted some opinions on it. Criticism is fully appreciated. I won't take it to heart unless you tell me "it was complete ass", lmao. But yes, onward. So, I don't know how to edit videos and voices and shit like that AT ALL, so if you're the kinda guy that knows how to edit stuff please hmu because I'd love to have you teach me some stuff. It would have been nice if I knew how to use autotune because it would probably make the song/rap/thingy a lot better. So, this rap is REALLY raw so keep that in mind when you're criticizing it.

Anyway, here it is.

These are the lyrics.


in the midnight

you watch me self-destruct I can't sleep right

I watch you slip away now theres no light

theres no light baby yea theres no light

no light baby yea theres no light

wake up to another break up

same drugs make me wanna stay drugged

hate love but I wanna be loved

you steal hearts but you never keep them

ya you reap them

ya you reap them

bottles up drink down

damn that henny take away my frown

smoke some loud

Mary Jane I'm on your cloud

sounds like

she knocking on my door she wants to know I'm alright

I think she know this'll be the last night

you left me with some deep scars

now I don't know if I can keep on

she gone

time push on

so gone

so faded

about to get GTA wasted

I'm talking vertical no hesitation

you watch me self-destruct I can't sleep right

I watch you slip away now theres no light

theres no light baby yea theres no light

no light baby yea theres no light

I'm so tight over these hoes

I feel so light

headed

is it cold in here

or is it just me

must be the lonelyness creeping up on me

if I had a princess I could put my trust in

I'm sure I could handle the world then

 

[FatGeorge]

The lyrics and beat are good, but if the Mic quality was better this would bang even more, keep working at it.
Do a diss track on @DJ Conyo next

 

[DJ Conyo]

nigge wanna end my career?? xD

 

[Kenty]

Great lyrics and beat and overall mood of the song. Good work man.

Clear out the background noise by using Audacity, it’s a free programme and I suggest adding the beat MP3 to the audacity space and record your voice using audacity so you can edit it and fix up any imperfections where needed.

 

[John Daymon]

i dont get the point of this song, do you have any relation to what you're singing?

 

[dante333]

@John Daymon It's mostly just your generic emo rap song you'll hear or see around the web nowadays. It's a story about a guy who woke up to his girl breaking up with him. He's been through a lot of horrible relationships and his ex-girl comes to his house to make sure he's alright. She leaves because he doesn't answer the door because he's so fucked up off of drugs and alcohol, and he continues his plans to kill himself over this girl who broke up with him. I can relate with the character because it be like that some time. You meet a girl you like and suddenly she wants to break up, now you're all depressed and shit talking about "I can't keep doing this shit". I'm not gunna sit here and say EVERYONE is like that after a break up but I'm very sure there are some people who can relate to that.

 

[John Daymon]

what i've understood people often tend to look for things in music that they can relate to, the artist going thru the same thing they have and such, if you haven't it's pointless doing music like this

 

[glacial]

Not everyone has to be the same john daymon. That's why if everyone did the same shit, music wouldn't be anything.

 

[John Daymon]

@gLaCiAl that's kind of what i'm saying, going for a genre that you have no real affiliation with wont take you anywhere, Lil Peep got so big because he actually had history with the kind of stuff he made songs about

 

[glacial]

@John Daymon clearly you aren't getting that abel stone is taking baby steps and you seem to know a lot how about you give him some tips mr.best artist of the century

 

[John Daymon]

Anywho; I think that you should keep going with music, most defo you should bud,

 

[Deleted member 5920]

With some proper voice editing this could be sick

 

[John Daymon]

@gLaCiAl that's not what i'm saying at all, lol but looking back at why everyone who are big are who they are today is because they did something different from the others, i'm not saying that Abel is trash or bad at what he's doing nor am I saying that I'm better than him because I don't do music at all, hence why I'm saying stuff such as

what I've understood

 

[dante333]

Completely understandable and I agree with you. I don't think it necessarily needs to be ME going through the stuff I'm talking about in the song however, what I talk about in the song is def something people can relate to for sure. At least on the level that, sometimes it feels like we just want to end things after a really bad breakup.

 

[dante333]

@John Daymon Thank you for the criticism John, much appreciated.

 

[dante333]

If you know someone that's really good at editing voices and stuff, feel free to introduce me to them so I can learn how to do it and make something EVEN BETTER in the future for you guys to listen to.

 

[Fielding]

Ay, this was good man! Mic quality wasn't the best but it is good enough.

I'm not a rap person but i defo liked this.

 

[Mxdium]

Do you have XLR mic? What software do you use to add it together? Do you know how to mix and master?
Just google some tutorials and you'll keep getting better and better. If you need some help using FL Studio 20 I am your man.
For top quality it is also smart not doing a one take audio file but pausing every now and then. Make sure it sounds okay and then continue with that flow and tone. The way you let your voice sound needs to be unique to get mainstream attention, for example, XXXTENTACION & Ski Mask started the distortion effect in vocals by accident but this did make them unique compared to others. Play with the effects until you find something you like. Emo rap usually has echoey vocals or multiple voices stacked.

If this is something you really want to do you need to invest some money into a XLR setup and some proper software. Maybe try renting a studio to be 100% sure this is what you want to do. I rented one with a friend and found out I really enjoyed producing, now I basically have a mini studio in my apartment.

Like Ethan said, with some proper mixing this would be a good song.

 

[Wiki]

Is this on soundcloud?

 

[dante333]

No