- Staff
- #1
“We give your rights back!”
Who we are:
Scaramanga Legal Firm is a (currently) one man organisation specialising within the Internal Affairs department.
As a proud citizen of Paralake, I’ve seen many a time citizens walked all over by cops, without the citizen even realising that the officer did anything wrong!
Scaramanga law firm has operated in the past on behalf of people either unable to access, or with little knowledge of the PLPD IA system. We’ve seen justice bought to several officers ranging from the inept to the outright abusive.
We will painstakingly go through the effort of going as far as making complaints on several officers in 1 situation!
As someone with extensive knowledge from the IA system, being on both the receiving end, the giving end, and everywhere in the middle, your complaints have never been handled by a more capable individual!
Services we offer include:
“Situational assessment”:
Know an officer fucked up, but can’t necessarily name how? We can provide you with a full situational assessment. This will give you a complete list, such as:
- What policies the officer has broken.
- What potential justifications they may have.
- My opinion on the matter.
Example of the written assessment you will receive:
Who we are:
Scaramanga Legal Firm is a (currently) one man organisation specialising within the Internal Affairs department.
As a proud citizen of Paralake, I’ve seen many a time citizens walked all over by cops, without the citizen even realising that the officer did anything wrong!
Scaramanga law firm has operated in the past on behalf of people either unable to access, or with little knowledge of the PLPD IA system. We’ve seen justice bought to several officers ranging from the inept to the outright abusive.
We will painstakingly go through the effort of going as far as making complaints on several officers in 1 situation!
As someone with extensive knowledge from the IA system, being on both the receiving end, the giving end, and everywhere in the middle, your complaints have never been handled by a more capable individual!
Services we offer include:
“Situational assessment”:
Know an officer fucked up, but can’t necessarily name how? We can provide you with a full situational assessment. This will give you a complete list, such as:
- What policies the officer has broken.
- What potential justifications they may have.
- My opinion on the matter.
Example of the written assessment you will receive:
Full, Unbiased Analysis:
The video evidence shows:
- Here I will list the course of events, and how the complainant behaved.
- If the evidence only partially addresses or implies this, I will mention in brackets.
The video evidence fails to address:
- Here, if applicable, I will list anything you claimed happened, and inform you if the evidence fails to demonstrate this.
- I will then, in brackets, explain whether or not this information may be retrievable through logs (like this).
Possible justifications for these actions:
- Here, I will, if any, list the potential justifications the officer might have. (Then, in brackets, say how probable it is to be considered as a valid defense)
- Probability ratings will range, from lowest to highest: “Impossible”, “Highly unlikely” “Unlikely”, “Potentially“ “Likely” ”Very likely” “Definite”.
Witnesses:
- Here I will list potentially good witnesses who could be contacted for information, if applicable.
Policy regarding the incident:
- Here I will list the accused policy breaks (Then in brackets, list if they broke them, and a link to the resource).
Overall opinion:
- Here I’ll list who I think is at fault, and what would be the ideal course of action.
Summary:
- Here I’ll Tl;dr the written assessment.
The video evidence shows:
- Here I will list the course of events, and how the complainant behaved.
- If the evidence only partially addresses or implies this, I will mention in brackets.
The video evidence fails to address:
- Here, if applicable, I will list anything you claimed happened, and inform you if the evidence fails to demonstrate this.
- I will then, in brackets, explain whether or not this information may be retrievable through logs (like this).
Possible justifications for these actions:
- Here, I will, if any, list the potential justifications the officer might have. (Then, in brackets, say how probable it is to be considered as a valid defense)
- Probability ratings will range, from lowest to highest: “Impossible”, “Highly unlikely” “Unlikely”, “Potentially“ “Likely” ”Very likely” “Definite”.
Witnesses:
- Here I will list potentially good witnesses who could be contacted for information, if applicable.
Policy regarding the incident:
- Here I will list the accused policy breaks (Then in brackets, list if they broke them, and a link to the resource).
Overall opinion:
- Here I’ll list who I think is at fault, and what would be the ideal course of action.
Summary:
- Here I’ll Tl;dr the written assessment.
Price: $10k + $1K per minute in the video if the video is over 2 minutes until 10 minutes have passed (Max 20K)
General consultancy:
We offer the following:
- Worried that your evidence isn’t enough? Shoot it our way, and we will give you advice on if the clip should show more, and what it should show. ($1000, free for active subscribers of Scaramanga legal firm)
- Need a policy violation named? Send us the clip, and we can find this out for you! ($1000, free for active Scaramanga legal firm subscribers)
Evidence from higher powers:
This service is free, we will legally use public records and government files through freedom of information to provide you with “Logged” incidents for the purpose of an Internal Affairs complaint.
Digitally Emulated Manuscript Of events (DEMOs) creation service may be offered in the future.
Internal Affairs complaints:
We can either:
- Make an internal affairs complaint on your behalf! ($8000)
- Provide you with a full, detailed written complaint to copy paste over to IA ($5000)
- Help you in providing a statement (POA)
Terms, rules, and conditions:
Payment information:
3325443
Contact info:
Paralake Email (Forum inbox)
General consultancy:
We offer the following:
- Worried that your evidence isn’t enough? Shoot it our way, and we will give you advice on if the clip should show more, and what it should show. ($1000, free for active subscribers of Scaramanga legal firm)
- Need a policy violation named? Send us the clip, and we can find this out for you! ($1000, free for active Scaramanga legal firm subscribers)
Evidence from higher powers:
This service is free, we will legally use public records and government files through freedom of information to provide you with “Logged” incidents for the purpose of an Internal Affairs complaint.
Digitally Emulated Manuscript Of events (DEMOs) creation service may be offered in the future.
Internal Affairs complaints:
We can either:
- Make an internal affairs complaint on your behalf! ($8000)
- Provide you with a full, detailed written complaint to copy paste over to IA ($5000)
- Help you in providing a statement (POA)
Terms, rules, and conditions:
Rules:
- Payment for most services is non negotiable and paid in advance.
- I withhold the right to reject, for any reason, involving myself in a complaint or providing legal advice. I will most likely explain why, but I am not inclined to.
- Consultancy fees apply Whether or not the complaint is accepted or not.
- We will reject your request if it is obvious the officer has done nothing wrong.
- Payment for most services is non negotiable and paid in advance.
- I withhold the right to reject, for any reason, involving myself in a complaint or providing legal advice. I will most likely explain why, but I am not inclined to.
- Consultancy fees apply Whether or not the complaint is accepted or not.
- We will reject your request if it is obvious the officer has done nothing wrong.
Payment information:
3325443
Contact info:
Paralake Email (Forum inbox)
