ill let you off proceed
being a dumbass as an admin and getting demoted =(
Let me tell you the story of an RP. An RP that caused permanent damage and has ruined almost every aspect of my life and why I never appear to do the fire department on here anymore.
There was once an RP that was thought up with a person to relax with, a warm comforting relaxing RP. This RP was nothing intense or had any serious story but was a good vibes and thing to relax with in a stressful abusive life. This rp was wonderful, the peak of life and heaven that was so great it fixed most of my issues.
But it was not to last, one day the person said they were getting tired and needed things they liked done. This was of course an honest request and compromise was tried at first, then it lead to offering to do just what they wanted. However, They did not accept this and instead threw it away. This caused a spiral of depression, lack of caring for ones self, and a mess of other problems.
That is what I truly regret. Something that has broken me so hard I wake up every day like the "Why are we still here, just to suffer?" meme. I was better off before i had it.
There was once an RP that was thought up with a person to relax with, a warm comforting relaxing RP. This RP was nothing intense or had any serious story but was a good vibes and thing to relax with in a stressful abusive life. This rp was wonderful, the peak of life and heaven that was so great it fixed most of my issues.
But it was not to last, one day the person said they were getting tired and needed things they liked done. This was of course an honest request and compromise was tried at first, then it lead to offering to do just what they wanted. However, They did not accept this and instead threw it away. This caused a spiral of depression, lack of caring for ones self, and a mess of other problems.
That is what I truly regret. Something that has broken me so hard I wake up every day like the "Why are we still here, just to suffer?" meme. I was better off before i had it.
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Blowing up bazzar with jerry cans is a big regret https://medal.tv/games/garrys-mod/clips/Nfoa9kFLM08lM/d1337mlCUVVc?invite=cr-MSxtbkwsNzkzNDIyODAs
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Sad to hear my man, PM me if you want to talk bout it/receive some advice.
Hmm at 2019 was working as cook for 12-15 hours a day/ 7/7 doing alot of drugs than sell them, was drinking alcohol alot, like even the chef bought me vodka to drink at work, i ended fucking my nervous system, atm i can die/blackout from 2-5 puffs of weeds, i am diagnosed with bpd and anxiety disorder, have to take lamictal, 400mg for rest of my life, and i am getting something like panic attacks or something with symptoms i can't even count every 7-8 hours some times are so intense , so i am taking around 2,5- 3,5mg xanax per day, trying to tapering them as low as i can, but if i am working i need atleast 5,5-6 mg to faction as A class cook. well i regret doing that at 2019 
it fucked me up, and ...well i ended almost dying 2 times..
it fucked me up, and ...well i ended almost dying 2 times..
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- Messages
- 374
- Reaction score
- 245
- Points
- 455
- Thread starter
- #73
Take it easy from day to day my guy, hope now all is better. Glad ur still aliveHmm at 2019 was working as cook for 12-15 hours a day/ 7/7 doing alot of drugs than sell them, was drinking alcohol alot, like even the chef bought me vodka to drink at work, i ended fucking my nervous system, atm i can die/blackout from 2-5 puffs of weeds, i am diagnosed with bpd and anxiety disorder, have to take lamictal, 400mg for rest of my life, and i am getting something like panic attacks or something with symptoms i can't even count every 7-8 hours some times are so intense , so i am taking around 2,5- 3,5mg xanax per day, trying to tapering them as low as i can, but if i am working i need atleast 5,5-6 mg to faction as A class cook. well i regret doing that at 2019
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